Most people walking into divorce court in Singapore for the first time have the wrong picture in their head. It isn’t a courtroom drama. At the Family Justice Courts in Havelock Square, a typical ancillary hearing lasts under 45 minutes, the judge has read the papers, and nobody is going to deliver a closing speech. What actually matters is what you’ve done in the six weeks before the hearing. I’m Wahab. I’ve sat at the bar table through more Family Justice Courts mornings than I can count, and the clients who do well have all done the same five things in advance. Here they are.
Understand what court you’re going to
Not every divorce touches a courtroom. If you’re on the simplified uncontested track under s95A of the Women’s Charter, the Decree Nisi (provisional divorce order) is granted on the papers without you attending. Most of my simplified matters never see a physical hearing.
If you’re contested, or if there are ancillary matters (custody, maintenance, and asset division decided after the divorce itself) to be fought, you’ll end up at the Family Justice Courts at 3 Havelock Square. That’s the white building a short walk from Clarke Quay MRT. The hearings that matter are usually:
- A Case Conference with the duty registrar, short and procedural
- A Mediation session at the Counselling and Psychological Services, confidential and off the record
- A Pre-Trial Conference with the judge hearing the case, used to narrow the issues
- The Ancillary Matters Hearing itself, which is the substantive one
If children are involved, you’ll also attend the Mandatory Co-Parenting Programme (CPP) online before the Writ is filed. It’s one session, about two hours, and you cannot skip it. For the full sequence of hearings and timing, our divorce timeline guide walks through each one.
Knowing which hearing you’re going to changes everything about how you prepare. Don’t show up at a Case Conference expecting to give evidence.
Bring the right documents (and in the right order)
On ancillary hearings, the judge has read the Affidavit of Assets and Means (Form 220) and any reply affidavits. If you want to point to anything at the hearing, it needs to already be in the affidavit. New documents produced on the day almost never get in.
What to bring anyway:
- Original NRIC (or FIN / passport if you’re a foreign national)
- A printed copy of every affidavit filed in the case, your side and the other
- A bundle of authorities if your lawyer has prepared one (cases and statutory extracts the judge may be asked to look at)
- Notebook and pen. You’ll want to write down any direction the judge gives.
- Your lawyer’s business card. Security at the courts will sometimes check if you’re with a practitioner.
Leave at home: phones on silent (not just vibrate), laptop bags you’ll have to unpack at security, and anything you think will look good “in case” the judge asks. Clutter makes you look unprepared.
The Family Justice Courts publish a practitioner directory for forms and procedures on the Family Justice Courts website. If you’re attending unrepresented, read their practice directions first.
Court etiquette: the unwritten rules
Singapore’s family courts are less formal than the State Courts or High Court, but the etiquette still matters. I’ve seen judges openly annoyed by small breaches, and an annoyed judge is a cost you don’t want in a discretionary matter like ancillary division.
What to do:
- Dress business-smart. Long sleeves, closed shoes, collared shirt. A baju kurung or a modest blouse and trousers is fine. Judges have commented in open court on people wearing singlets and slippers.
- Arrive 30 minutes early. Security, lifts, finding the right courtroom, and sitting quietly before you’re called all take longer than you think.
- Stand up when the judge enters and exits. Don’t sit until they sit.
- Address the judge as “Your Honour”. Even on Zoom hearings.
- Don’t interrupt. Not your spouse, not your spouse’s lawyer, not the judge. Your lawyer speaks for you. If you need to tell them something urgently, write it on a sticky note.
Two things I’ve seen go badly. One client brought her mother into court and the mother began filming on a phone during the hearing. Recording at the Family Justice Courts is prohibited and the matter was adjourned, which cost the client another six weeks. Another client laughed audibly when his ex-wife gave her evidence. The judge mentioned it in the written decision. You don’t want to be a character note in the judgment.
Prepare what you’re going to say (and what you won’t)
At an ancillary hearing, most of the argument is on paper. But you may be asked to take the stand for cross-examination on contested issues: a disputed figure in the affidavit, a claim of misconduct, a disputed bank transfer. This is where preparation in the week before pays off.
Three rules I give every client:
- Answer the question asked. Not the question you wish had been asked. “Did you withdraw S$12,000 from the joint account on 14 March?” is a yes or no, not a three-paragraph explanation.
- If you don’t know, say so. “I don’t remember” and “I’d have to check my records” are perfectly acceptable answers. Guessing isn’t.
- Don’t fight with the other side’s lawyer. They want you angry. Angry witnesses say things they regret. Stay on your answers, not on them.
You’ll spend a session with your lawyer walking through the likely questions. At A.W. Law that prep session is built into our fee and typically takes two to three hours, a week before the hearing. If your lawyer hasn’t offered it, ask.
The bigger prep piece is substantive. By the time you’re at the hearing, the disclosure package should be tight (see our financial disclosure guide for what goes into that), the custody proposal should be workable, and the maintenance figures should add up. If any of those aren’t in shape, the hearing should be postponed, not walked into.
Work with your lawyer (the hard truths version)
The clients who get the best outcomes are the ones who treat the lawyer as their working partner, not as a magician. Five behaviours that help.
- Tell your lawyer the bad stuff first. If there’s an affair, a gambling issue, a cash-in-hand side business, an arrest record, I need to know at the start. I can’t fix a surprise that comes out at cross-examination.
- Respond to document requests within 48 hours. Most delays in my cases are clients not sending payslips back. Delay means a missed deadline means a worse outcome.
- Don’t negotiate directly with your spouse after filing. Whatever you text can be screenshotted and filed as an affidavit exhibit. Go through the lawyers.
- Don’t shop advice from friends. Every divorce is facts-specific. Your colleague’s “he got full custody in 2019” isn’t a precedent for your case.
- Trust the timing. The simplified track runs 4 to 5 months. A contested matter runs 10 to 18 months from filing to Final Judgment. Pushing faster than the court process allows just costs more.
Cost-wise, a contested ancillary matters hearing in my practice runs S$8,000 to S$25,000+ in total legal fees depending on how many issues are fought and whether there’s cross-examination. An uncontested ancillary stage runs closer to S$3,000 to S$6,000 on top of the base divorce fee of S$1,500 to S$3,500. These are ranges, not quotes. After the first meeting I put a fee structure in writing. You can also see the whole cost picture in our divorce cost breakdown.
What to do the week before the hearing
Three takeaways. One, know exactly which hearing you’re attending and what the judge will have already read. Two, spend two to three hours with your lawyer rehearsing the answers to the hardest questions the other side could ask. Three, eat breakfast, get to the Family Justice Courts 30 minutes early, and leave your phone on silent.
If you’ve got a hearing date and you’re not sure your preparation is where it needs to be, the first ten minutes with me are free. Book a Divorce Discovery Session and I’ll tell you honestly whether you’re ready or whether we should ask for more time. If your matter is still early and could go to mediation before a contested hearing, our mediation and arbitration page explains what that track looks like. If you’re trying to decide whether to contest at all, our contested vs uncontested divorce comparison is a useful starting point.
